RETIREMENT PLANS



Do I have to plan my retirement? Do I have enough money set aside so I can do all the fun things the brokers and investment people say are just waiting for me if I plan properly?


There will be travel to exotic places, beaches to lie on in the warm sun, blank canvases to fill up with paint as I take up new hobbies, sailing in the boat I have always wanted, but just didnt have the time.


Oh for crying out loud, get real. I never had the money to do most of those things when I was in my peak earning periods. How the devil would I get enough money to invest in all those joys waiting me in retirement?


Of course, like most of the retirees today, I didnt have my plan exactly up to date. I got as far as knowing when I wouldnt have to go back to that lousy job Ive had for the last twenty-five, or thirty, or forty years. That was the extent of the retirement plan. But like most of my fellow retirees, (this is taken from my absolutely made up poll) I get by.


For the first year I felt like a kid skipping school, and getting away with it. Fantastic feeling. Then I finally understood that I could do full time what I had been doing on the sly for all those years, not much. I think most of us, (remember this is the completely bogus poll) dont do too many exciting things in our lives. I wouldnt know how to sail a boat anyway and I like to look at paintings, but do one myself? Get outta here.


So I will do what I want to do for the near and most likely the far future. Like most of us, I will watch the television, read a few more books, really have time to appreciate my spouse, if youre lucky to have a really good one like I do, play a little bit with our grandchildren,involve myself in social protest movements. My current protest is a silent
protest against wearing ties. I promised myself I would never put one on again and I am keeping that promise.
What? Did I hear you say what an empty life, or was that GET A LIFE? My friend, this is my life. I have worked my required forty years or so and raised three children and still have the same wife. I never did all the things I planned for in retirement and I probably never will. But I am happy being a semi couch potato that does not have to punch a clock anymore, along with, I bet, the majority of other retirees.
(According again to my scientific polls that is.)


By Jim Kittelberger
The man who did all the research for this article. Someone had to.



(C) copyright 2000 Jim Kittelberger. All rights reserved.